Sunday, December 12, 2010

sad


i am sad, sore, broken-hearted and empty. as much so, if not more, as a couple of months ago. as if all these weeks of healing, strengthening, growing and learning never took place.

last night i dreamt of a friendly old man. i asked him what the medicine was for a broken heart, and he said i should insert a live eel into my heart. so i looked it up on internet. turns out eels stand for a 'great journey into oneself, from which one emerges transformed beyond recognition'.

sounds great. in the meantime, there is just good old same me, with my good old same ache, and my good old same inability to do anything with it but hurt...

4 comments:

TweeMeisjes said...

Oooh.
Mmh. Ik denk dat ik het gevoel herken.
Ikzelf ga tien dagen mediteren: google Vipassana.
Dat wordt op zijn minst een innerlijke reis..
Sterkte en altijd blijven ademen. Dat helpt :-)

Véronique said...

oh, Marc doet het ook ieder jaar, de vipassana. hij heeft er altijd veel aan. ben je wel eens eerder geweest?

Anonymous said...

Perhaps this is an interesting link for you too: http://www.linsdomain.com/totems/pages/Eel.htm

(Would very much like to know where you've got this "great journey into oneself" explanation from...)

Josh said...

a hug for you.
can I send you the book the mood cure? it helped me a lot with feeling better this last year.