Monday, July 19, 2010

korablik

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just imagine: this little orange plastic boat, with the big heavy water-loaded rope like a noose around its neck. and all its life, the little boat has been bearing the rope, because at the end of the rope is the anchor, and the anchor is holding the boat down, keeping it safe. and then one day, it turns out there is no anchor. there is just rope, heavy water-loaded rope, like a noose around the neck, attached to absolutely nothing. the boat has been floating freely all along.

i am struggling with this: freedom, safety, anchoring... and the many heavy water-loaded ropes hanging in my wake... struggling and frightened, but still afloat. heavily loaded, but also free.

(the title of this post comes from this old old song, sung by a grand blind lady, about a cheerful little boat that first spent sometime building itself from scratch, and then went on to sail the world, being its own boatman and its own captain.)

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